All by Myself

My Dad always likes to remind me of all the times that I acted like an indignant child. "I do it myself" as I said quite often. Well, last night was another one of those nights... I ventured to a bar by myself for the first time. Somebody had recommended a place called the Burger and Beer Joint - and that was exactly what I needed last night. Maybe a beer more so than the burger, but hey, I took both. I posted up at the bar and ordered myself a Guinness...what else? Then I got to begin the fun dance of where to look, who to talk to, when to laugh, when to look at my phone, when to pretend that I'm interested in the basketball game on TV, when to order food, how much of it to eat....and the list goes on and on. I never realized there would be so much involved in going to a bar by yourself. Then again, maybe it's just me...I'm sure other people go to bars by themselves all the time and have no problem making friends or knowing how to act, but since this was my first attempt, I really had no clue what to do. It turned out alright though - I made friends with the 3 bartenders who rotated...they were probably wondering why I was sitting there all by my lonesome, guzzling Guinnesses with the saddest puppy dog eyes. OH, the burger was amazing by the way. I got the Buck Nekkid burger which was is a burger without the bun, topped with grilled onions - I added jalapeno. And it came with mushroom fries!!! They basically tasted like shrimp tempura, except they were strips of portabello mushrooms. Fantastic and definitely unexpected! This place also has a large selection of ice cream and I saw a few fabulous-looking sundaes glide by the bar. I resisted though - I figured beer and a burger was bad enough without scarfing down some ice cream, and we all know I can eat me some ice cream. Although this night turned out to be pretty fun and I made a few friends at the bar, I have figured out that I have a slight case of social anxiety. It stresses me out to think about walking into a situation in which I know absolutely no-one. Yes, I made it through one night but will I venture out and do it again? I'm not sure....the future is undecided. It's so much easier to stay in a bubble and never go out of your comfort zone, and I know I do that too often. Branching out is good but it takes a lot of building up my nerve to actually do it. All I can say is thank goodness I had my phone and friends who were willing to text me throughout the night. That is one thing I noticed - anybody who was at the bar by themselves was undoubtedly playing on their phone for at least half the time they were there. But to Annie, you are a lifesaver with your hilarious texts that make me laugh and wipe that 'bitch-look' off my face if even for a few seconds. Apparently the sports bar stays open until 5am most nights----ridiculous, but who knows? I might make it back there sometime this weekend because even one familiar face is better than none.